Time to cry..

I finally found my journal I recently purchased because I couldn't find my old journal.  A pattern emerging perhaps?  One, I journal so infrequently (kinda like I seldom post blogs) that I don't remember where I left them.  Two, it is an unfortunate representation of my life right now. Hectic, chaotic, stressful and disorganized with little time for me, God, reflecting or even learning.  I just finished reading about a month's worth of Liz's blogs.  I am ever amazed at the things she finds time to do, learn and share. She is always researching things, putting cool pictures and links on her blogs, creating things, doing things, sharing life, learning things. I seem to work and struggle to keep up with that or things at home - just mundane, regular things like groceries, cleaning, laundry, finding things I've misplaced :).  I guess I spend a fair amount of time keeping up with long distance relationships through phone calls and try to enjoy as much quality time with family as I can.  But, as I read through her blogs, many of them made me cry- and the posted comments.  I look forward to a lifetime of getting to know the special, multi-talented young lady that my son has claimed as "wife".  

     The journal entry I made in my personal journal today I entitled - "no time to cry".  There have been many hard things in life lately and it seems I have a difficult time finding any personal time to deal with them, cry over them, fully turn them over to God for his care and handling.  My Dad's illness tops the list.  There are many changes in the dynamics of my immediate family as well. My responsibilities at my job have increased, and my free time has decreased - considerably. There are many things that I feel a need to sort through and "figure out" with God.  I have made the decision not to go into work today, though I feel behind in management responsibilities.  I really need today (Sunday) off.  I need more time to live and enjoy life, savor moments with loved ones,  build real relationships with people in Mobile (including my husband and daughter), take care of things (so I can find them), meditate, be filled by the Holy Spirit, learn new things, take care of me.   In part, Liz, through her blogs, has inspired me to make time to nurture those longings and talents God has given me.